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Posts Tagged ‘Patience’

The Best-Laid Plans Are Tentative at Best

March 31, 2013 11 comments

roadtohell

“The road to hell is paved with good intentions.”

I had really good intentions this week. Maybe that’s why we ended up in hell for a while.

The saying is right up there with Steinbeck’s….

The best-laid schemes plans of mice and men often go awry.”

And so it was this week. There were good intentions and best-laid plans. Heck, the table was practically set!

Heading into the week thoughts were on the baking and making of good food, the joining of good friends, a long weekend in the good woods, some good puzzling, and a good, old-fashioned, awesome egg hunt around a great pond!

Who needs the White House lawn when you have this?

peace

Instead, our intentions and plans were ransacked by reality. Spring Break was anything but a break and I had to remind myself (more than once) why I named this blog what I did, when we ended up with this…..

flu1

…..a trip to the ER Thursday night that lasted well into the wee-hours of Friday morning.

De-hy-dration. Not eating a full meal for nearly a week, having fever and losing body fluids from every possible body-crevice will put your girl on a fast-track to needing nutrients from an IV bag for sure but it was the nosebleed that just-would-not-stop that sealed the deal and sent us to the hospital.

Damn you this year’s flu!

Both A & B strains have descended upon our house for the third time this season even though we’ve all been inoculated.

“Go back to the science lab!” I say to the medical team that concocted this most ineffectual vaccine!

“You missed the mark — completely!”

The second time we visited our doctor this week, she advised us that this year’s flu shot was approximately, only, 10% effective.

Taking the world on with a smile. I needed to remind myself. Did I mention in-between doctor visits, the diagnosis of flu and bronchitis and just before our jaunt to the hospital that it was my girl’s birthday this week also?

“Roll with it.”  I kept telling myself. Take it all, on with a smile.”

When you have kids, some days just get like this and sometimes those days turn into weeks. Patience and flexibility are key. Plan B is always helpful. Life after all, is full of surprises, the good and the not so good.

As a parent you accept that the best-laid plans are well, tentative at best.

So, I’m taking the world– my world — on with a smile. And even though it’s mostly just on the outside for now, I know, as sure as the sun will rise tomorrow, this too shall pass.

Happy Easter!~ Happy Passover!~ Happy Birthday!~ Happy Holidays!

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Dinner For Two

April 22, 2012 18 comments

I have a standing dinner-date every Thursday with the same guy for the past five months.

Truthfully, I was the initiator. In fact, at first he resisted. I insisted. And although it started out a little shaky and often felt tentative right up until the last-minute, somehow, he always “showed-up“. In the beginning clearly, it was to appease me, more than likely out of a feeling of obligation. I understood. I gave him space. There was a lot of silence at the beginning too, not exactly awkward; more like “dead air”. I let him breathe and get used to the idea of spending time alone with me. I searched my brain for stimulating conversation and tried to bring up things I thought would interest him.

I have an amazing relationship with my daughter for which I am very grateful. My reluctant dinner-date — who also happens to be my 13-year old son — and I, have struggled quite a bit over the last two years. Living life on life’s terms and dealing with all that’s come with it, has taken its toll, created confusion, distortion and a disconnect between us.

Grappling with how to get him back, I tossed, turned and weighed many possible scenarios over and over in mind. I kept coming back to this weekly, dedicated time and space, this  Dinner For Two.

At some point, you have to listen to your heart, trust your instincts and take a leap of faith. I had faith in him and me and the mothering and nurturing I’d done for the first eleven years of his life. And even though it was very difficult for the first few months, I never gave up.

Neither did he.

You can bore through hard things and get to the other side, as long as you don’t give up.

Patience and perseverance paid off. Time has healed.

It occurred to me this week, that now, it’s a given and there’s no doubt that we’ll have dinner on Thursday, just him and me. It’s become part of the schedule, part of the “routine” of our week.

It’s something I look forward too. It’s not however, something I take for granted — not for one second. I cherish and appreciate this time well spent; this time where I can just be my boy’s mom.

There are no more awkward moments of silence. Our discussions spread across a wide range of topics these days. I’ve learned a lot about various basketball, football and baseball players as of late. He asks me about my day and my interests. He’s forthcoming with the happenings at school.

It’s not perfect, nothing is but we’re connected again and I’m grateful.

“A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.” — Agatha Christie

Photo Credits #1 & #2: Google Images

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